Monsoon morning – Thanksgiving 2 days later Saturday, Nov 24 2007 

Last night at 4 a.m. Holly jumped into our bed scaring me and not even annoying Scott who slept through it.  She has an early warning system for serious storms (any containing thunder) and it works long before ours.  Apparently it went off – cause one moment I was asleep and the next moment trying to quietly shove an ummoveable dog off our bed.  Finally it occured to me perhaps I should log on and see the storm was anything to be in prayer about.  (Yeah, you read it – I pray over storms using www.noaa.com to watch it – and pray with reason.  Just remember Jesus took control of storms too, and told us we could ask anything in His name and He would do it that our joy might be fullJohn 16:24)

 The answer to my search was no concern, just know I had to wear my crocs outside today. 

But now, it’s morning, like 10:23 a.m. and I’m still abed (laptop, thank you to our son Chris) and being thankful again. I am so appreciative to the Lord and my husband who kindly furnishes my happy home.

We had such a wonderful day on Thanksgiving. And another again yesterday.  I asked our family and friends to bring foods to our celebration and they outdid themselves.  Such labors of love – and such gourmet edibles! 

My husband did a moist and tasty turkey (17#) on the barbie, Chris and Sara brought creamed peas, green bean casserole, apple pie (oh, my, yummie) and the best homemade rolls.  Ben did an amazing job on our friend Jan Sanders sweet potato casserole and then made gravy causing us to say “Good gravy Ben” (inside joke). Lori made wonderful cheesy cabbage and great cranberry salad. Scott and Lisa brought a strawberry/pretzel salad and made the garlic mashed potatoes.  Albert made ham glazed with cherries that disappeared yesterday! I did my typical smoked salmon ball.  The one thing different for me was doing a crockpot stuffing.  I wanted to try to free up oven space, looked it up on the net and boy, was it good!

The point of the excess food was because we planned a 2-day celebration. The original Thanksving day was 3 days!

Yesterday was awesome too.  Activities were puzzles, card and domino games and playing with the children. Scott and I walked Zay down to the neighborhood park, where some 30-40 slidings later we declared him a “righteous dude”.

Our other activity was grazing on leftovers from 9 a.m. until 10:30 p.m.

The thing we agreed on was we made no plans.  Eat when you want, what you want, and spend your time enjoying one another. Some of us napped, some just sat idly staring (wishing their nap was longer, probably) and others of us just grinned and cuddled the kidlets. The kitchen got cleaned up when it was needed and we had loads of time to chat and play.

I am so thankful.  While others are  emailing me about traumatic Thanksgiving with dysfunctional relatives and friends – I am lying here totally content with our time.

What made the difference?  None of us had any expectations.  Except we wanted to be together and enjoy one another.  I think we’ll do it this way every day for the rest of our lives. 

The thunder is growing louder and louder, and frankly it may be my tummy so I’m off to the kitchen to graze. 

Be good to one another, lay aside expectations and enjoy who one another are.  Each one of us is a wonder, a delight and we need to treasure each other.

Let me rant momentarily please Wednesday, Nov 21 2007 

Some days my email box fills up with stuff that makes me arrrggh!

I had to adopt standards and I wish others would.  Like ….

Does the email cause fear to arise in you?

Is it too good to be true?

Any email that I answer “yes” to I automatically check out on snopes.com or urbanlegend.com – for the simple reason that fear is not of God and there really is no free lunch.

If it’s too good to be true – it probably is! 

I cannot believe the number of bright people who simply forward junk because “it might be true” or “what if it’s true?” 

You know, like the offers/warnings from Microsoft, Starbucks, Applebees, – the endless chain letters promising that if we get 2000 signatures the President will do something or other……

Spread the word – if you don’t have time to check it out – don’t send it.

 See how this feels – let’s pretend the “You” in the following statement is to the ones who do this crazy thing to the rest of us.

Stop sending me this garbage, cause I’ve half a notion to
hit “reply to all” and tell all your friends
they are lazy and irresponsible for not checking this stuff out! 
And that you are implicated cause you did it too!

 Then I think about the stupid things I’ve done in my life.

Then I think about the mercy of God.

Then I think about how much I really do love them and wouldn’t want to hurt them.

Then I just quietly send them the snopes comment “Hoax” or “Untrue” and get on with my  wonderful and busy life.

When I think about the love I know……. Friday, Nov 16 2007 

This morning I slept in, allowing my coffee to get cold while I snuggled in my sheets.
Everyone should do that once in awhile ~ not all the time, cause it would lose it’s special gift.

I was thinking about the love I know.  I am so loved.  It seems I always have been.  Even through my parents divorcings, the horrible abuse of my life before Jesus ~ I have been loved.  Someone loved me.  I knew it.

I knew my Dad loved me.  He was an awesome and wonderful Daddy.  Not without faults, but love covered them and I only basked in that love.  I didn’t really get my Mom, although my memories are filled with loving times.  Some how I thought she didn’t love me.  It was after we buried her I found every poem I’d ever written her, every note, all her personal treasures of my love to her.  Oh how she loved me.  Her love was just difficult to understand – mainly because her past defined love for her in ways a child couldn’t understand.  Children are so black and white in their understandings.

My Gram loved me.  Oh, I know she loved me.  She had amazing faith and love that oozed out of her quiet being.  The older I get the more I identify with her.  She was my personal refuge.  One of my fondest memories is running into her home, finding her with her Bible open on her lap weeping.  What an example for a child!

Grandpa B. was so onery.  He loved me too, and I remember with fondness the times we sat on the front porch of the grocery store eating stuff (bologna, cheese, turnips, pears – whatever).  He would see someone walking down the street and look at me and say, “Tell me her story”.  He loved me enough to take time with a 4th grader and taught me to “read” people.  I still do that, lovingly.  It is the fount of the compassionate love I have for souls.

dadgranpa.jpg

My Daddy and My Grandad

My cousin Robert loved me (and at 71 still does, I talked to him yesterday).  When he got home from the service and bought his brand new shiny baby blue car he came over and gave me a ride in it.  He loved me enough to want to make sure I was not ignorant about birds and bees, saying, “I want you to learn this from someone who loves you.”  Even though I was at the time mortified (1961) I was overwhelmed by his love.  What a wonderful man.

My Uncle Frank was such a man of God.  He and Aunt Jeanette loved me in ways only true intercessors would understand.  They never said an unkind word about anyone.  That in itself is amazing!  They loved me so much they made every time we had together special with their wonderfully contagious faith.  I know they are one of the reasons I’m alive today, for they prayed for me when I had Bright’s Disease and died at 10 years old.  They sent me a tiny cotton prayer cloth that my folks pinned to my pajamas.  A prayer cloth they prayed over and had AA Allen anoint and pray over.  I carried it until I was in my late 20’s.  When I visited their home in Oroville they confirmed my desire to be closer to the earth as a spiritual quest.  I was no longer ashamed of my great longing to be more self-sufficient, greener, and live a simpler life.  I thought it was just because of the time I lived communally – living off the earth.  (Ha!  I was so high back then, off the earth has a totally different meaning!) But they shared with me God’s loving heart in giving man dominion over the earth.  Moreover they lived it.  They loved me as He does.

The other one whose love is unconditional and wonderful has known me since we were Brownies together in San Diego.  I haven’t seen Patty for 51 years. Our friendship is still just as real and we are getting together this Christmas.  She and Doc have moved to Vicksburg and Scott and I are stopping by. 

This morning I opened my email to my friend Cindy’s suggestion to listen to the video I posted.  She and I go ‘way back – and have just this year restored our friendship.  She loves me.  Amazing woman.  I know she has my back.  That is the way her love manifests – that, and in exhorting me to climb higher and not miss the view.

But mostly, when I think about the love I know – I think about Jesus.  I’m beginning to cry now, because His love always overwhelms me.  It makes me so thankful for each one in my life, each one He has used to love me and keep on loving me…….. even in times when I wasn’t particularly lovely or loving. 

When I think about the love I know, my spirit opens up, I transcend the earth of my office and my day, and my heart soars heavenward to bask in His presence.  In His love, I feel so accepted, so confirmed, so cherished, so wanted.  In His love, I know nothing is impossible, all India can be saved, children in foster care can be provided for, single friends will find their mates, Michelle and Brenda will be healed.  Everything that is dear to me, is dear to Him and when I think about the love I know – I know it.  I love being His loveslave.

Being His loveslave simply means I am at His disposal.  Whenever He wants me to climb to the mountaintop and shout down the devil I will.  Whenever He wants me to hold someone close I will.  Whenever He wants me to be His pen I write.  Whenever He wants me to carry someone’s load I will.  When lovingly He asks me to speak for Him, I will.  But best – whenever He wants me to come aside and just worship Him, I will race to do it.

When I think about the love I know – my thoughts always are of Jesus. His love is the very best love I know.  The very best.

Brace Yourself Friday, Nov 16 2007 

I thank God for friends like Cindy D. – she sent me this link.

It overwhelmed me.  Turn on your sound and

Brace yourself.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xWnvBM40xxw

Anyone wanna coach me? Thursday, Nov 15 2007 

Hey you experienced bloggers -

I’d like my blog to look better so as to appeal to a greater number of folks.

Anyone wanna give me some simple pointers.

Please don’t tell me to read something ~ I learn by doing.

Blue Angels – A Picture of the Bride of Christ Thursday, Nov 15 2007 

I don’t know if it was because Dad was a US Navy man that I love the Blue Angels or not. I know he loved them.  I know that any time they were performing anywhere close we got to go.  Countless airshows!  I even liked Liberal’s Pancake Day because of the Blue Angels in the airshow.

Blue Angel Inverted Close, very close 

Blue Angel Collage

After I got to know the Lord as my Warrior King, I realized what an amazing picture of the Bride of Christ the Blue Angels are.  They do acrobatics that are incredibly precise and beautiful – but each maneuver is used in combat.  They fly so close to one another, occassionally there is a bit of paint on a wing from another plane.  They fly at incredible speeds – but always have the terrain totally mapped out. 

They are deadly war machines that would cause fear in the hearts (and tummies) of those who see them.  I wouldn’t want to anger them.  Very, very costly war machines.  Each one bought with a price.  They are painted blue (like heaven) and gold (like deity), but still they land after every show – earthbound like each of us.  Each pilot that flies in the great unknown returns to earth duties, responsibilities and life.

The commander gives each command precisely and it must be carried out perfectly.  Not only for the safety of the pilots, but for those on the ground.  No room for errors – they are perfected by reason of experience. 

Go see them.  Let your imagination catch you away with them, see yourself His Warrior Bride and then go home and become a better intercessor.

My banner says “The 18th Psalm Battalion” and my motto is “Is There Not A Cause”.
If you want, read the scriptures I have on my intercessors shield.

Psalm 18:30-50
As for God, His way is blameless;
The word of the LORD is tried;
He is a shield to all who take refuge in Him.
For who is God, but the LORD?
And who is a rock, except our God,
The God who girds me with strength
And makes my way blameless? 
He makes my feet like hinds’ feet,
And sets me upon my high places.
He trains my hands for battle,
So that my arms can bend a bow of bronze.
You have also given me the shield of Your salvation,
And Your right hand upholds me;
And Your gentleness makes me great.
You enlarge my steps under me,
And my feet have not slipped.
I pursued my enemies and overtook them,
And I did not turn back until they were consumed. 
I shattered them, so that they were not able to rise;
They fell under my feet.
For You have girded me with strength for battle;
You have subdued under me those who rose up against me. 
You have also made my enemies turn their backs to me,
And I destroyed those who hated me.
They cried for help, but there was none to save,
Even to the LORD, but He did not answer them. 
Then I beat them fine as the dust before the wind;
I emptied them out as the mire of the streets.
You have delivered me from the contentions of the people;
You have placed me as head of the nations;
A people whom I have not known serve me. 
As soon as they hear, they obey me;
Foreigners submit to me.
Foreigners fade away,
And come trembling out of their fortresses.
The LORD  lives, and blessed be my rock;
And exalted be the God of my salvation,
The God who executes vengeance for me,
And subdues peoples under me. 
He delivers me from my enemies;
Surely You lift me above those who rise up against me;
You rescue me from the violent man.
Therefore I will give thanks to You among the nations,
O LORD,And I will sing praises to Your name.
He gives great deliverance to His king,
And shows lovingkindness to His anointed,
To David and his descendants forever.

New American Standard Updated

A Poem ~ Do You Yearn to Fly? Thursday, Nov 15 2007 

Do You Yearn to Fly? 

Blue Angels

It’s been told in years gone by
How a sweet young man yearned to fly
He jumped off boxes, chairs and things
Yet he never ever sprouted wings. 

His heart broken, his hopes dashed
Thankful though, he’d never crashed
He laid aside his dream to fly
And sought the Lord to glorify. 

When he was old we heard it said
He had learned to fly right from his bed.
And with each first morning’s light
This old man would take flight. 

He soared on spirit winds so free
Visiting towns, villages and countries
What’s best, he never traveled alone
In tandem with God, his face shone.

And at the close of every day
We have heard it said, he was known to say
A soft sweet whisper of “Good night”
Loved by the One who taught him flight. 

Now are you curious, do you wonder
Is this poet’s mind gone asunder?
No, my senses have not fled
I know how he flew without leaving bed.
 

I know he yearned to fly
Perhaps, just like you and I
But hindered by his humanity
He decided to pursue divinity. 

One with God in holy prayer
His heart took flight into the air
Transported like Stephen long ago
On His face that Holy glow. 

Speaking mysteries in the Spirit
Groaning, moaning, he didn’t fear it
To be found with unknown faces
When God took him to unseen places.

You, too, my friend, you can fly
But to yourself you must die.
Give up your will, give it to God.
Then in intercession go abroad.


I wrote this July 13, 2004 for a friend, a pilot, and an intercessor.

More cat legs than imaginable – the answer Thursday, Nov 15 2007 

My husband, again I am raving about him, is brilliant.

He got the answer right away.  It is 10,990.

sprawlcat.jpg

The secret is first multiply out to find out how many big cats, then little cats, add the number of big cats to the number of the little cats, multiply times four for the number of legs, and add 14 for girls legs.

I am so sorry, we no longer have the Excel spreadsheet – perhaps if you google the riddle? 

Things I am thankful for ~ Thursday, Nov 15 2007 

It’s barely morning, but again I’m up cause I couldn’t lay there wishing I was asleep.  I’d rather be productive. So I decided to begin getting ready for Thanksgiving my own peculiar way. So, I got to thinking about the things I’m thankful for (excellent topic any time).

I am thankful for my husband.  Amazing, wonderful man.  Tonight when I decided to get up, he woke up, asked why, and then volunteered to pray for me and did.  Sweet, huh?

I’m thankful for our son Ben.  He is such a hard working young man.  Gets up early and is out the door by 6:45 a.m to get to work, after work he goes to college, gets home most days around 9 or 9:30 p.m.  And like tonight, he popped in to say “hi” and talk to me a bit before he went out for a run.  He’s recently been purchasing his own bedroom furniture, IKEA stuff he loves, all in black.  He’s put it all together and frankly, it’s beautiful.  He’s so fun to have around.

I’m thankful for our son and daughter-in-law.  Such sweet, loving, fun folks.  Their lives are scheduled ‘way better than mine.  I’ve learned from their expertise.  They bless us by coming over on Sundays and dropping in from time to time.  I’m collecting baby stuff for the day they make us grandparents.  No – it is not anytime soon.  It’s just I’ve learned to do stuff ‘way ahead from them.

I’m thankful, very thankful for friends I’ve had since I was a child.  One of them, Hadley, emailed me today telling me he checked my blog often.  He said he enjoyed knowing God helped me to overcome the pain.  He would.  He’s in the medical field.  He knows doctors don’t cure.  And not only that, he’s been a man of faith ever since we were in grade school together.

Another friend, Cherilyn, emailed me recently – she and her husband are driving truck.  Cherilyn is another friend I’ve known since grade school.  She is such a talented woman of God, too, Cherokee, and feisty.  Nothing ever gets her down, she’s like the ever-ready bunny, so encouraging.  She thinks I’m beautiful.  Back at ya, girl, if you read this.

I’m very thankful for my shirt-tail cousin, Beckie.  She and I have known each other since we were two for sure.  We have pictures of us at my 2 year old birthday party.  Beckie is everything I admire.  She was an example of Christianity to me in troubled times, a true friend who only offered support.  She’s talented beyond belief, I don’t think there is anything she cannot do.  Besides being a wonderful quilter and seamstress, she decorates beautifully, does amazing crafts, and of late, has been doing things like bathroom remodeling.  Courage and faith in one package.  Thank you Lord for this girl who inspires me and makes me think I can do anything too. 

I thank the Lord for all the young friends in our lives.  They keep me young.  They keep me honest.  They keep me real,  They keep me on my toes.  They keep me guessing.  And they make the most beautiful babies and wonderful children in the world.  I am so pleased that my own nephews and nieces are among this group – a generation of young people who want to change their world!

I thank God for my sisters and brothers. Each one of them is a prize.  Each one of them latent with talents, skills and abilities.  Each one of them a Christian.  Each one of them tolerates me and loves me for who I am. 

I am so thankful for quiet nights when I can just spill out my heart to you all who read this blog.  I love the night-time.  I thank the Lord that my parents taught me to love the dark instead of fear it, and to love the night and enjoy it’s quiet.  I’m thankful for a husband who enjoys getting up to watch the shooting stars in August or comets in November.

Sad Holly

I’m thankful for our doggie, Holly.  She is such a good friend.   We call her a canardly, because we “can – hardly” tell what kind of dog she is.  Her mother was indiscreet and her owner wanted to put the puppies down so I rescued Holly at 4 weeks.  Bottle fed her for over a month and half, every two hours, just like a baby.  Now 8 years later, she has me trained.  I give her table scraps.  I know it’s wrong, I read the yahoo blurb about it today too.  But thank the Lord (again) we eat healthy.  Do you know she alerts me every time there is a stranger on our property. Jesus will protect me, but I am absolutely not afraid because of her.  Also I am a excellent shot (still).

I’m thankful for our garden.  The creeping fig on the fence (8′ tall) has made it into a secret garden.  We had to pray over it when we first moved in 5 years ago.  It looked like a lunar scape.  Rocks.  Rocks. Rocks.  Not one tree.  No plantings except for 3 bushes in the front.  Now we call it our resort.  Semi-tropical here and so we have oranges, bananas, herbs, and all sorts of flowers.  Thank you Jesus, all my mums from last year came back and are gorgeous.  I go out there in the mornings and read my Bible, drink my coffee and watch the world wake up.  Sometimes I take the laptop out and work for a couple hours.  Boy, is that inspiring.

I’m thankful that creation wows me.  I get caught by a pine cone hanging, the innumerable shades of green, beautiful amazing dragonflies in every color, and the sweet smell of the jasmine on the fence.  I sing that old favorite, “I come to the garden alone, while the dew is still on the roses” out there in my garden.  I’m thankful for old hymns.  Hmmmmmmmm.

Here are the words if you want to hum along ~

I come to the garden alone
While the dew is still on the roses
And the voice I hear falling on my ear
The Son of God discloses.

And He walks with me, and He talks with me,
And He tells me I am His own;
And the joy we share as we tarry there,
None other has ever known.

He speaks, and the sound of His voice,
Is so sweet the birds hush their singing,
And the melody that He gave to me
Within my heart is ringing.

I’d stay in the garden with Him
Though the night around me be falling,
But He bids me go; through the voice of woe
His voice to me is calling.

Night night my friends ~

Chronic pain Friday, Nov 9 2007 

Take care of yourself!  Don’t yield to youthful arrogance and feeling you’re okay doing stupid things.  Stop trying to be tough.  Exercise regularly and eat right. Don’t wait until you’re 55 to do something.  Begin now! Learn from my mistakes.

With nearly 60 broken bones (including back), tons of torn tendons and ligaments, 5 major diseases (3 chronic), 5 rapes, numerous other injuries – my body has been badly abused.  I am glad I know Jesus!

I live with chronic pain.  This is pain on a daily level of 6/7 on the 1 – 10 scale.  Often it is a 8 or 9, sometimes a 10. 

I manage it with prayer, breathing deeply, meditation (lovely beaches, happy children, mountain meadows), massage, hot water, hot pads, muscle creams, exercise (yoga and pool) and medications like gabapentin (an anti-epileptic drug for the neuropathy), vicodin (for the hundreds of bone spurs, arthritis, lack of cartilege, and joint replacements) and tramadol (daily 3 x) just to maintain.  The other thing I do is cry or cry out.  I put my face in the pillow and bawl.  It helps.  It’s okay to be weak if you are.

I believe that healing comes from Jesus.  My doctor is a believer and a wonderful gal and she and I both believe this. She knows she diagnoses and prescribes, but cannot cure.   I’ve told her I intend to be fit and free from drugs.  That caused a bit of a seismic rumble, since she was a pharmacist before becoming a doctor.  But I wanted her to know I’m not taking stuff I don’t need and I fully intend not to need it.  She’s okay with that.  Presently I have a Rx for tons of pain meds that I don’t fill because I hate the side effect – no life.  I can’t just sleep all day or walk around stupid.

I have experienced tons of healing and some miracles, notably when I was 10 I died from Bright’s Disease (kidney failure, 1955) and well, I came back, obviously.  But when I died I told Jesus if I lived I would serve Him and I am.  I believe He can, does and will heal. 

One day I will write my healing testimony here.  It will build your faith.

My job now is to exercise, eat right, crave fitness, and talk health to myself.  I have found one of the best things to mute the pain is thinking about other things.  Ah, yes, now you know why I stay busy. 

The worst time is at night, just when I lay down.  Gravity hurts me.  The second worst time is after I have been sitting, standing, laying down.  Yep, that’s right, I’m not comfortable unless I shift positions lots.  This is inconvenient for seminars, church, and an 8 hour sleep (whew, can’t remember when I’ve had 8 hours sleep without drugs).

You know, I’ve just got to rave about my husband again.  Sometimes at night when the pain is bad, he will rub my feet with lotion until I fall asleep.  He has a remarkable ability to put me to sleep.  Sometimes just a cuddle in the middle of the night removes pain and enables me to sleep.  I whispher “Honey, hold me” and he awakes, shifts position, cuddles me and goes immediately back to sleep.  Holding his hand also removes pain.  No, it’s true.  The endorphins released relieve pain.  And without getting real – marital relations are fantastic for relieving pain. No headaches here!

Right now, my job is to endure.  I can outwait my enemies. 
Matthew 24:13 says “he that endures to the end, shall be saved.”

James 1:2-4 Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials,  knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

I have hope!  I have faith.  I have patience. And when all else fails – I have the knowledge that He who has begun a good work in me fully intends to complete it and my destiny is secure.

And now – at 4:48 a.m., I’m going back to bed and get that cuddle, hopefully to sleep some more.

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